Food for thought from the desk of Grace Marshall – life coach, business owner and mummy with many hats

Hello and welcome to my blog. Delighted to have you here.

Grab yourself a cup of tea, or a glass of something nice, and have a wander around my thoughts on life, work, motherhood, faith and passion... along with other things in my world. Feel free to drop me a line or leave a comment and let me know what inspires you. I'd love to hear from you.

You can also find out more about me and what I do at www.grace-marshall.com.

Margin: the antidote to overwhelm, frenzy and stress

I have come to realise that I am a filler by nature. Give me time and I will fit something in, give me space and I see boundless opportunities. I like to be productive. Get lots done. Lead a rich and varied life. Work and Play. Have my cake and eat it. If you're like me, you'll know that amazing feeling when it all comes together and works a dream, and the nightmare when it falls apart. And let's face it, when we stack the bricks up high, it doesn't take much to topple the tower - a snow day, a sick day, a bad night, an unexpected phone call, a family emergency, a burst pipe, broadband outage, car trouble or an explosive nappy.

And sometimes it's entirely down to me, fitting in that phone call or errand when I'm running ten minutes early, forgetting that nothing ever takes five minutes, and ending up twenty minutes late.

In the pursuit of balance, peace and sanity, I'm learning the value of space, like air in a pillow: in itself it's immaterial but it plays a vital role in between the fibres to allow for movement and comfort, and to absorb impact. I've been playing with the idea and trying to find a name - breathing space, overspill room, buffer - and then twice in one week it came to me - Margin.

Margin: the space between our load and our limits.

Playwork

Things to do with a problem - or an idea.

Open it up
Peel back the layers
Turn it around
Focus
Give it to someone
Take ownership
Swap it
Put it somewhere else
Chew on it
Turn it into a game

As inspired by Catherine, aged 1, with a book of stamps.

Got baby and business? 5 Ways to Ensure You Never Have Enough Time

We’d all like to manage time better. In an ideal world we would do what we need to get done, what we want to do, and have time to spare. We’d have that work life balance thing worked out, have a clear To Do List and be stress free.

In reality, most of us get overwhelmed from time to time, worry how we’re going to fit it all in, and feel guilty that we don’t spend enough time on our business, our family, our house, our health... Especially those of us with small children or small businesses. Or indeed both.

I’m a mum with two children and two businesses. I must admit I rarely walk past a book or click past a website that claims to have the secrets to time management, without a lingering pause. Often my cursor hovers over that Buy Now button, wondering if this one finally will give me that 25th, 26th and 30th hour that I’ve been looking for.

If I’m honest I’ve probably spent no insignificant amount of time and money on the search for this holy grail. I’ve picked up some great gems along the way, and I’m still looking.

In the meantime, here are a few pitfalls to be aware of, five ways to ensure you never have enough time:

Business Integrity - the How and the Why

I read this recently: “As the Why gets stronger the How Do I becomes insignificant”.

For someone who is a huge fan of purpose, passion and motivation, why did I find myself recoiling?

I’m a huge fan of the Why. It’s fuel, it’s passion, it’s what really makes the world go round, isn’t it?

But recently I’ve been discovering that the How is far from insignificant.

Ever been in an argument where “it’s not what you said, it’s how you said it”? If you’re married, you may be nodding especially fervently!

Several months ago, I found myself at loggerheads with a business contact, who felt they had the raw end of a deal - a deal that was not struck with me, but in their eyes, I had the lion’s share of what they wanted.

Rest and Rhythm

In front of me is a book I am looking forward to reading later tonight, titled Working from a Place of Rest, by Tony Horsfall who I had the pleasure of meeting and learning from yesterday. So here's a question for you: Do you work out of rest or rest out of work?

I probably tend towards the latter. I like to get a sense of completion, of work well done, before I allow myself to properly rest. I can take breaks quite easily, a quick breather, a cup of tea, and sometimes hours or even days of distraction and procrastination. But I never really allow myself to rest - physically, mentally, wholeheartedly - until I get that sense of satisfaction that a good chunk of work is complete, that a milestone has been reached.

Well that’s my tendency.

Looking after the multitasker

Thanks to Jacqueline for another comment in my last post about Multitasking and Focus:

“...Perhaps it is not so important whether you multi-task or not but what is important is the quality of focus, which may be best served with resting the brain from time to time.”

Those who know me through my blog, e-course and other writings, will know that I am passionate about self-care and the idea of giving yourself the things that really put you in top form.

We all know on some level or another that we have to keep ourselves healthy, fit and well in order to continually succeed in whatever we decide to apply ourselves to. Yet quite often, with busy people in particular, we put other commitments first, and sometimes our own needs fall to the bottom - or completely off - the list.

As multitaskers generally tend to be busy people, I wonder if this affects us even more?

Multitasking and Focus - Is it better to do one thing at a time?

I'm also a great multi-tasker, but sometimes I wonder if it is not more efficient to focus on one thing at a time. The busyness of multi-tasking sometimes seems to produce much activity, albeit enjoyable, but no firm results. What do you think Grace?

Thanks to Jacqueline’s comment on my last post, I’ve been reminded of the many times I’ve heard "Isn’t it better to focus on one thing at a time?" - in fact I think I’ve even been known to say it myself, probably to my son when he’s been holding a toy in one hand, a melting ice-cream in the other and trying to negotiate a big step at the same time.

This has gotten me thinking about the definition of multitasking. 

Multitasking - what's your take on it?

Well apparently June is the month for a 30-day blogging challenge.

Which I guess times in quite nicely with my own writing challenge. Can I let you in on a secret? I’ve been trying to write something for quite a while now. And I seem to be having trouble getting started.

With my little girl becoming more and more alert by the day, being a full-time mum is becoming even fuller, so gone are the days of spending virtually the whole day in the garden getting creative and pouring my thoughts onto paper. My thinking time now happens in snippets, in between feeding, changing and looking after my 3 month old, feeding, playing with and toilet training my 3 year old, keeping my business ticking over and (sometimes) keeping on top of the laundry.

So this blogging challenge has intrigued me – I wonder what kind of collection I can create, by posting snippets on my theme throughout the month of June?

Who knows it could be just a mass of rambling thoughts, or maybe I’ll end up writing the whole thing in bite size chunks? I do know that the best way of getting me going is to start a conversation, so I wonder if you could help by throwing some comments and questions this way?

Ironically my theme is multitasking. Being something of a serial multitasker, I’ve come to realise that I tend to be at my best when I have a variety of hats to wear, or several strings to my bow. Perhaps it’s the variety I enjoy, or maybe I’m just too impatient to wait till one thing is done before I move on to the next. Either way multitasking actually enables me to enjoy each of my roles more. I’m not sure how the logic works, but it does in my case!

How about you? What’s your take on multitasking? What do you find most challenging or rewarding?

Positively flipping

 "A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes" ~H Downs

Are happy people just lucky, or oblivious to negative situations? Or is it that they are able to find the gems in every situation?

I have lots of reasons to be happy right now - most of all the birth of my daughter Catherine, two weeks ago. She's great, but she is a baby. Which on the flipside also means plenty of reasons to be stressed and despairing - the lack of sleep for one!

I really believe that you can choose how you experience things by the attitude you take and what you focus on, and this worked for me even in childbirth.

Even though it was of course intensely painful, and some things didn't quite go to plan, I'm sure that focusing on the upside of everything - including contractions - was conducive to the really positive childbirth experience I had this time. In fact, I was feeling so good afterwards I could have left hospital practically straight away, and I'd even go as far as saying I could have almost done it all over again - almost!

Another reason for me to be happy is that tomorrow is one of my favourite foodie days - Pancake Day (or Shrove Tuesday), marking the beginning of Lent. While some of my friends are giving up chocolate, crisps, biscuits and even tea, I've been scratching my head.

Today

"Yesterday is history.

    Tomorrow is a mystery.

        Today is a gift - That's why it's called the present."

                     ~ Kung Fu Panda

What are you doing with your gift?